Monthly Archives: September 2014

About the Scandal Season 4 Premiere

These are just a few of my thoughts about the Scandal Season 4 premiere. Is’s not really a recap; I thnk that Awesomely Luvvie does the best recaps. She is funny and insightful, and did I mention funny? Back to Scandal…for those who thought Season 3 was just meh, this episode was so good. It was All That. It was IT! I was switching my allegiance back and forth the entire episode:
– Ojake, I think/wish/hope Olivia should&would just give Jake a real chance but we know it won’t happen, Jake from State Farm is the Rebound Man…but I also think they have good chemistry.  So until she and Fitz reunite as Olitz, I am on team Ojake
– Randy-don’t-give-a-Huck (his “Next Customer” reminds me of the Soup Nazi on Seinfeld…”No soup for you, NEXT!”) I’m going to start saying it when someone gets on my nerve…NEXT CUSTOMER! It’s a reminder that there are more people who can occupy my time. See how you can learn from Scandal?
– Redhead Abby was on fire (pun intended); that is all
– Musty Mellie – YASSS!

– Papa Pope = Papa Pinocchio

– Olivia is BACK

– Jake from State Farm can get it!
– When Olivia and Randy/Huck were going back and forth I was hollering with laughter at those two, especially when she purposely broke the phone and he just calmly gave her paperwork to fill out. Two seconds later I had tears in my eyes when he said “when you come in here, I have hope and Randy does not hope”.
– When Mellie was lying on that grave..I was, as Luvvie says, UNABLE! Tears tears tears
– Cyrus and his hair are two separate characters now; and they summed up the exact viewer feelings on Olitz…”let’s not pretend we don’t know how this ends”
– Back to Mellie when she said “it’s 1976 down there” – she don’t give a whatwhat, she nahkir (say it with the West Indies accent…naaaah kiiir). Mellie doesn’t care about Jack!
– Back to Olivia at the end when she did the feminist speech of LIFE while doing the Gladiator Walk of Slay past her forbidden, distant lover (cue the Marvin Gaye song)

Whoo-hoo this episode had me on an emotional roller coaster of feelings! Loved the end when Olitz walked past each other and everyone else disappeared…until they shaded each other like they were each invisible…except for those fingers reaching for each other, and the self-satisfied smirk they both had. HAWT!

Countdown to Olitz 2.0!

Lessons from Work

Just got back from a work trip so I am just getting back to blogging. Today is considers TBT, or Throwback Thursday, in social media world. Having just joined FB, I am still catching up on stuff. I usually refer to it as Thoughtful Thursday. For today I will combine both, Thoughtful TBT.

It would have been a work anniversary for me today, 25 years of service. I left in May- which is a separate blog post- but today I wanted to reflect on what I learned. I remember the day because it coincides with my dad’s birthday and he and I joked about it when I started. I expected to just be there a couple of years while I finished school-yet another post- and today I look back on 25 years. I moved around to several departments through promotions and my quest to climb the corporate ladder. The work was good and often fun, until it wasn’t.

What I remember most though is not the actual work, it’s the people. I met wonderful, interesting, accomplished, faithful, funny, kind people: several became and remain friends to this day (ya know who you are), others passed through for a quick minute yet left a lasting impression, some were in a negative space, and others were justthisside of cray. But I learned from every single person I encountered. Maybe not right away, especially if it was a contentious situation, but eventually lots of life lessons began to take hold in my heart and my mind. One of the biggest and best lessons is that it matters how you treat people. Manners and respect count; have respect for yourself first and it will be easy to respect others…even when they do stuff that don’t ‘deserve’ respect. And it matters who you are with people. Be genuine, be honest, be kind, and do your part. I believe everyone is here for a radon and to fulfill a purpose. Do your part; no one can do what you were sent here to do but you. No one can do what I was sent here to do but me. Yes, we can and should help each other, but it doesn’t make sense to want or worry about what someone else has or doesn’t have – it’s not what you’re supposed to have or not have. Do you…and just know that the rest will be taken care of, always.

Peace & Love

Cell Phone Detention

So my older son got detention for cell phone use. It’s his first year with a phone, and someone actually called him…during class…during a test. And he had another ‘incident’ just the day before, so a detention slip was issued. As Monk used to say, “here’s what happened”:

His math teacher Mr. A was telling the class that he still has a flip phone. D joins in support, saying “Hey Mr. a, I have a flip phone too”… And he whips it out of his pocket like he’s at show and tell. Well the school policy is no cell phones during the school day. The teacher, who is also the grade chair, looked at him as the whole class laughed. Then she showed him grace and just told him to put it away. D told me about it later that day and we had a good laugh about it.

The next day…yeas the Very Next Day, he had a math test. Exams are given in home room, so as the entire classroom was silently working away on their math problems, hoping and praying to get the sanswers right…brrriiinnng! BBRRIIIIINNNNGGGG!!! D’s phone rings.

He emailed me and asked if I called him. I responded, no way- I know he’s in school and I wouldn’t call unless there is an extreme emergency. His dad Patman is not making phone calls to most folks at 8:45 am let alone to him. Only a few people have his number since he is just now getting a phone. So what the bleep?!? How and why was it heard anyway?

It turns out that he had his phone on vibrate. It wasn’t in his pocket. But it was in his book bag…in the classroom instead of his locker. “I thought when he said put it away I could put it in my book bag”. I was thinking one of Fred Sanford’s famous phrases; the one he always says to Lamont when he does something goofy. I thought it but I didn’t say it. I mean, who among us hasn’t said or done something goofy sometimes? Often? Regularly? Ok, several times a day? Raising my hand here…

Oh, and the ‘person’ who called?  The blinking cell phone company reminding hm to pay his bill, which was due…THAT DAY.  Sigh…BIG SIGH.

You know detention for him is also detention for me right? Since I’m the one who takes him to school and it’s a good distance away, we already leave early just to get there in time for 7:45. Now imaging having to get there for 6:45. SIGH. This is one of those moments when you want to squeeze their heads!

But the good news in all of this is that he learned his lesson; I’ll bet that won’t happen again!

Sparing The Rod

 

 

 

Book of Proverbs, 13:24

“He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.”

 

 

By now most of us are familiar with the Adrian Peterson situation.  for those who aren’t, the Minnesota Vikings star running back is in much trouble for his disciplinary methods with his children, particularly his four year old son.  Peterson is accused of hitting him multiple times with a tree branch, a switch if you will, causing welts and bleeding.  Supporters of Peterson claim that he is only doing what more parents should be doing with their children and that society would be better off if more did.   Detractors claim that what he did was nothing more than child abuse and that corporal punishment sends the wrong message that violence is an acceptable correction method.  What does Patman have to say about it?

 

Let me say right away that I totally favor corporal punishment.  I am a black man born and raised in the South and in both cultures, corporal punishment is accepted and encouraged.  I myself experienced the rod of correction at times when growing up and I don’t feel that it was child abuse or that I am worse off because of it.  I realize that my upbringing doesn’t apply to everyone, I’m simply speaking from experience.  As far as Peterson though, he crossed the line.  Any form of discipline, physical or not,  has to be administered out of love and with the focus on corrections.  When skin if broken and the child is scarred, that is unacceptable.  I don’t believe that Peterson is abusive or violent but like many of us, yours truly included, He reacted out of anger and didn’t put as much thought into what he was doing before merely reacting.  As a father of two sons, I know how hard it is sometimes to keep your emotions in check but you have to.

 

I am reminded of when I was about five years old.  I got into a fight, if you can call it that, with a kid across the street from me.  I had a tendency to not stand up for myself which frustrated my father.  In order to toughen me up, he kept sending me across the street to fight him and I would end up walking back home.  it finally ended when the kid’s aunt threatened to tell his mother.  My father, out of anger, began whipping me with a belt which my mother thankfully put to a stop real quick.  My father apologized later that day and about 27 years later reflected on it in regret.  While I have long gotten past it, I use it as a reminder to myself of when to put anger and frustration aside and let love and common sense prevail.

 

When is physical punishment acceptable you ask?  There’s not a cut and dry answer to that but what we do in our home is to give our children a solid sense of what is right and wrong, what is acceptable and not acceptable.   When punishment is called for, we don’t immediately go for the belt or switch but simply take away their privileges and/or allowance for the week, or month.  Corporal punishment is used mainly in extenuating instances, for instance, disrespecting a teacher as school then lying about it.  Even then, we make an effort to let ourselves cool down and give our child time to think about what he’s about to receive and why he’s receiving it. Most of all it is done out of love.

 

Regardless of what happens with Adrian Peterson going forward, thankfully this has started a water cooler discussion about corporal punishment and whether it’s right or wrong, effective or ineffective.  Whatever eventually happens to Peterson is a call the court system and the NFL have to make but how you with your own children, however, is entirely up to you.  All I can tell anyone to do is to put God, love and common sense first and more often than not, the right decision will be made.

Be a Help to Someone

So there’s a lot in the news regarding domestic violence. At another time I will share some of my own experiences, but that’s another post for another day.

Today I want to talk about helping others. How does this relate to domestic violence? October happens to be Domestic Violence Awareness month. I know it’s also Breast Cancer Awareness month and because that cause is so well-known, it kind of dwarfs anything else happening in October.

About 2 weeks ago, I started buying more pink and purple t-shirts to use a workout gear. I don’t know why but it was laid on my heart to wear pink and purple in October for Breast Cancer and Domestic Violence awareness. Last week Thursday as I was on my way to Zumba class, it was laid on my heart to ask the instructor about having the entire class wear pink and purple. Maybe not for the entire month, but on a designated day or week; and maybe we could find a way to support one or both causes. I said to myself that I would wait until after class to ask her.

Do you know that 10 minutes before the end of class, she asked us all to turn around. She had something to say and wanted to get it out without getting emotional – which is why she asked us to turn around. I didn’t move. Some people asked if she was leaving and to our relief she said no. (Side bar: she is one of the BEST Zumba instructors ever! Energetic, positive, enthusiastic, encouraging, and in shape – all the attributes you want in an exercise teacher).

Anyway,  she went on to say that her mother called her the night before with the news that they found a lump in her breast and she was going to have surgery that day.   I couldn’t believe it.  Not only were we all properly shocked at the news, we were open-mouthed at the fact that she still came to class.  I would have been on the first thing smoking, and BUMP a Zumba class.  That’s my momma!  When I could gather my thoughts, I asked for her mother’s name so I could add her to my prayers.  And I told her that I admired her for still coming to class; it showed her commitment, dedication, and professionalism.  It’s probably one of those classes where if you don’t work you don’t get paid – but still.  She showed up.

So I started thinking about how are we ‘showing up’ in our daily lives?  What are we thinking, doing, or saying that moves us closer to our life goals and purpose?  And how are we helping someone else along the way?

During the same time, the news about Ray Rice, Adrian Petersen, and other NFL players just dominated every channel, radio station, newspaper, and social media outlet.  I hope that it results in some honest conversations among men and women, boys and girls about the importance of treating everyone with respect – starting with ourselves.  And I hope that more people get involved in helping to stop the cycle of abuse.

Today, about 20 minutes before Zumba class I spoke with a friend who told me that they found lumps in her breasts.  Her biopsy is tomorrow.  I asked if anyone was going  to be with her and she said no, I made the snap decision to meet her there so that she could have some support.   I’m only sharing to show that any action that we take is still some type of action.  My point in this post is that we should find ways to get involved in something other than ourselves.  There are so many charitable organizations, so many causes that need help- financial help and volunteer help.  Whether big or small, every action that you take is worth the time.  So while I intend to champion Breast Cancer and Domestic Violence, I ask that you find something to champion.

I’ll end with today’s  Verse of the Day from Bible Gateway, which I happened to post on FB early this am: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.”  Philippians 2:3-4

Hi there!

How is everybody tonight?  This is Patman, the papa bear, big daddy of Society Simmons or however you’d like to refer to me 🙂 .  I am looking forward to our upcoming journey and being able to share it with you.  You’ll find that I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things regarding family, politics, social issues and a little bit of you name it.  Stay tuned and enjoy.

 

 

Hello world!

Welcome to our blog.  This is a family blog that aims to show different perspectives on a wide range of topics.  Whatever comes to mind, we’ll try to write about it.  Society Simmons is just our way of identifying as the Simmons Family: Man, woman, boy, boy; Daddy, Mommy, son, son – you get the drift.  We hope you read and comment on what you see here.

 

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